We Walked Him to the Door
A MAID death is like no other — it is deliberate, legal, and comes at an appointed time. Through the eyes of his widow, this memoir tells the story of Ron’s MAID journey and of its effects on his family. Ron suffered for years with chronic pain, slowly losing his quality of life. When finding relief from the health system failed, he made a bold decision — to access medical assistance in dying. He was able to so because of Bill C-7, which received royal assent in Canada in March of 2021. Replacing the original MAID law (Bill C-14), the new law allowed people whose deaths were not reasonably foreseeable to end their lives.
Accessing MAID was not easy. First, Ron had to find support for his application since none of his doctors backed his decision. Next, he had to prove that his physical suffering was unbearable and that he had tried every remedy possible. For his family, learning of this decision was devastating. However, watching his decline and suffering had been equally difficult. Even his three beloved grandchildren were aware that he was not the grandpa they once knew.
The memoir is also the story of a relationship, from Ron and Lori’s first meeting at university to their last day. Both Anglo-Quebecers with a long family history in the province, the two built a life together. Early days, bonding with Ron’s two young daughters, moves to other parts of Canada, and trips abroad provide memories that Lori rakes over as she awaits the day chosen for MAID — all to the backdrop of that ticking clock. She and the three daughters formed a team, providing love and support, and working together to make Ron’s last months as fun-filled and easy as possible. The book examines the courage it takes to stand by someone facing MAID.
Finally, the memoir is about the aftermath of a death, and the huge void that is created when one loses a partner of thirty-five years. Building a new life in Nova Scotia, with grief as a constant companion, created its own challenges.
